Quaking, my toes curling over the crumbling edges of The Tower, waiting for Change.

The work went material for months,

light and optics,

reflection, refraction,

away from writing,

what a relief not to be obliged to meaning

the smaller light paintings I see bobbing at the top of makermind

i could use different emitters.

i could read my old statements, remind myself of the work,

 I could give it a fresh start

writing time, work in the world, places to float these experiments, sites that no matter how I slice it, the work will be experiments, right out in the open.

Back in the studio, the Seeing area is open and Mythologist revives in the sun, glow and matte recombining the shimmering painted writing.

Installation packing, and four stories below in the low cement maze of factories and docks, someone’s car horn is blasting incessantly, like a hit, or a key fumble, creating a harmonic buzz together with a bee in the studio that hovers palsied circles around the word ‘Fragile’ scrawled in blue marker on a shipping box on the cement studio floor.  Bee reminds, docking and re-docking on my slumping but not defeated red boots, and now on the neoprene laptop case, messengerbuzzing urgent swirls with languagely precision and tidiness,

bee buzzes my right forearm, the makerness, always i went for the trees, bee makes nice with the hairs of my arm, ‘messenger of what?’, i inquire, listening with my ears a quarter-turn too tight,

work shows me proposal after proposal, these are curator’s choices, my job only is to figure out and gather materials for contraption.  i urge myself to let go of  pressure about the work arriving. it always does. i build the work hours into the calendar, and like fishing in a barrel, eventually there is some resulting moment I give to the world. i’m satisfied. like a hurricane.

scrim and bronze as see-through opacity and moire,  this is how I bring the bronze. how does the work stand up from the floor without attaching to the building? good solutions are almost always easy. I use only materials at hand in the design.

how fortuitous. of course. that my duties should serve each other. how they all become practice, little boxes of practice, stand-ins for the always arriving, more polished production.