card two: 9 of cups: Happiness.

in the read as Influences furthering or hindering the Basic Situation

“This moment,” the card tells me like Tami would, “This moment is harmony and inner joy.  Open yourself to it fully”

and that’s what I’m not doing.  I even was sent on surprise to a shaman interventionist today who told me of the great importance of happiness.  I was like, I can do without it to  do more sooner.  As long as I can get back to it while everything is still doable.  and she said no, I had to have it now.

I thought of my present satisfaction and glee about clearing and renewing and cleaning my home – is that happiness?  is the road to happiness the same thing as happiness in a Universe we just observed is in a constant state of Becoming?  and the fact that we expect happiness to be an unbroken state drives half of all people to the bottle or the coco krispies or whatever is your thing.

The Happiness card as the “Influences hindering or furthering the Basic Situation.” The unknowing shaman today with her message of happiness, how it has to be there, period.  even the constitution of the you-nited states the pursuit of happiness as the underlying raison d’être?  the?  most valuable application of the self?

I’d look it up but I can’t touch the world tonight, or it will wiggle and upset itself awake in my mind, a hydra of lists and hard math problems, deadlines, and things I should say/do/be,  with digital so-long-ago clocks in a near numeric blur, churning into the emerging future in a hundredth-second whir of barely distinguishable amber numerals, like for a shuttle launch or a telethon numerating endlessly off the left end of the display, back into the primordial pure math of my desire to see.